When death becomes a wish

A 46-year-old man works as a security guard. He has six children and supports his parents. He spoke about the living conditions after the spread of COVID-19 in the Gaza Strip:

“I could barely cover my family’s daily needs from my income which does not exceed 1000 ILS and which I receive every 40 days. I’m a simple man, I live in North Gaza district, and I work as a guard at one of the governmental headquarters in Gaza. My oldest son studies in the university, and my wife is sick. She lost sight in one of her eyes and she does not see well with the other. She needs ointments and blood thinners, constantly. I usually bring her medicines from the UNRWA clinic or the government clinics, and sometime I buy them out my own pocket. My 82-year-old mother lives with us and she suffers from hypertension, diabetes, and kidney disease, and thus takes medicines on daily basis. I bear the cost of some of her medications.

People think that because I have a job my economic condition is fine, but what they don’t know is that I can barely live with the income I earn. I made my old son skip his university for this semester because I cannot afford his tuitions. I buy the cheapest available medicines for my mother and wife. We eat meat only once every month. My children don’t even use transportation, instead, they walk. My wife cannot bake bread in the house because of her weak sight and I cannot buy bread from the bakery. I make the bread myself in the house. We drink from [salty] tap water because I cannot afford filtered drinking water. I take the long road back from work to evade the supermarket because my groceries’ debt reached 4,000 ILS. After the outbreak of COVID-19, things became worse, I cross miles every day on foot from my house in North Gaza to Gaza City. Due to the lockdown, my only option to get medication for my mother and my wife is to buy it from pharmacies. We eat only bread with thyme without olive oil. Two days ago, my sister called me, she’s also experiencing a bad living condition, she wanted to borrow 20 Shekels from me which I did not have; I only had four shekels. I hanged up the phone and started crying alone in my room. I had to sell my cell phone, and I’m planning to sell my wife’s cell phone too. There is nothing else I can sell to provide my family with the daily needs. I don’t know when will this end, but I wish to die every day.”